There are tears stinging the backs of my eyelids every time I shut my eyes to pause. This world is hurting me so much. The truth is, I'm living, I'm so very much alive, so fit, so healthy, at my peak... except I'm doing it for the spectres that haunt me and keep my blood running so cold. I am a living eating disorder. That's it. There's nothing else left in my head anymore. You know, I'd give anything, to update my facebook status to say really 'what's on my mind'. Don't you ever just want to scream at the top of your voice. "PLEASE HELP ME. Underneath this pretty blush and giddy personality I'm dying, I'm torturing myself, I'm killing myself. Please fucking help me." I've reached the stage where I can't eat anything without throwing it up. The only reason I'm not losing weight is because my initial intake is so much that I can't be getting even half the calories back up anymore. I'm 22 years old and my l...
I've been an anonymous follower of yours for a longggg time, and you constantly inspire and amaze me. You continue to. Your entries are captivating and...free, in an truly enchanting way that keeps me coming back! Stay well hun, we all have days of exhaustion, but you'll pull through.
ReplyDelete<3 stay well
I just came across your blog tonight . . . and this post wrenched my soul. Please be okay. You can E-Mail me if you want. Don't do anything rash until you've exhausted other possibilities.
ReplyDeletehere's a smile for you:
:)
and a virtual hug.
DON'T YOU FUCKING DARE!!!!
ReplyDeleteFLUSH THOSE PILLS DOWN THE TOILET RIGHT NOW, 'FELIA!!!!
I love you and you deserve BETTER than that!!
Ive been reading your blog for a while and i think you´re very tallented at writing and you can have a bright future.
ReplyDeleteI understand the feeling of wanting everything to stop and just sleep forever...I´ve tried to kill myself several times, and most times I´m glad it didn´t work.
This dissease is so consuming but you have to fight it sweetie, don´t give up.
I really hope you don´t do this, you´ll hurt so much people and more important you´ll miss all the good things life can and will give you.
Sorry for my english, I´m from Argentina
Hugs and i hope I´ll we reading more of you
Please, please, please don't. You are such a beautiful person, and this world would be so much darker without you in it. It does get better.
ReplyDeleteYour words inspire me.
ReplyDeleteAnd they are so true to what I feel.
I want to help you, but I'm not sure you'd listen.
We all love you.
Please, stay.
Ophelia... What have you done?
ReplyDeleteI hope you're okay, darling.
ReplyDelete♥
Please stay - our bodies and our lives are the only things we really have - you've destroyed one, so please, please hold onto the other. I've been reading your blog from the beginning and your words cling to me, your writing is beautiful, and I want to grab hold of you and make you stay. And tell you it will be ok, somehow. xoxo
ReplyDelete