"I stayed there, staring at myself in the glass. What do I want to cry about?.... On the contrary, it's when l am quite sane like this, when I have had a couple of extra drinks and am quite sane, that I realize how lucky I am. Saved, rescued, fished-up, half drowned, out of the deep, dark river, dry clothes, hair shampooed and set. Nobody would know I had ever been in it. Except, of course, that there always remains something. Yes, there always remains something....Never mind, here I am, sane and dry, with my place to hide in. What more do I want?....I'm a bit of an automaton, but sane, surely - dry, cold and sane. Now I have forgotten about dark streets, dark rivers, the pain, the struggle and the drowning...." Jean Rhys, Good Morning, Midnight
I relate.
ReplyDelete♥
I know that feeling oh so well... *hugs* hang in there, darling.
ReplyDeleteRemember to take a moment and breathe.
ReplyDeleteDisconnect yourself emotionally from the situation.
Empathising with you xx
Every little thing is going to be alright. I don't know your tastes in music, but reggae and classic rock got a lot of things right, including their messages. It may be something to help get you through these tougher times; it helps me, at least. Much love, darling.
ReplyDeleteI know how you feel - I don't know how many hours I've spent lost in fantasies about DIY liposuction using a big, sharp knife & a vacuum cleaner
ReplyDeleteI´ve been thinking exactly the same way for years...what happened in these past days?You sounded so hopefull in your last post.
ReplyDeleteWhen i have thoughts like these i try to spend time with some friends who really understund me and distract myself, at least that works for me.
Hugs honey
Flor
WHY DOES IT ALWAYS HAPPEN.
ReplyDeleteOH I LOVE YOU DON'T DO IT. LISTEN TO MY OBNOXIOUS YELLING.